THANKS ALOT!

thank you for giving me 2 unforgetable valentines days surprises!!

everybody must wondering i had a happi valentines days in this year.... good guess! but wrong!

no matter how i love u, u stil da 1 who hurt me so much... im done of it!! calling me n questioning me alot bcoz of that gal?! my god!! r u insane!! hurting me again n again... last time i try sms n call u but no reply! n now bcoz of tat gal u keep calling me n question me!?!? wat a joke!! if u cant settle it urself pls dont come n bother me with the thought of hurting me!! i dont care that u're gonna call me bitch or crazy woman! i dont care anymore!!

from the beginning u already know im tat kind of person! if u cant stand for it pls dont do so much during tat period! dont make me crazy love u then u tell me u had enough n giving some kind of stupid excuses to seperate and only a fool like me will simply accept!!!

i didnt tell any1 tat u're bad!! ppl keep telling me u're a jerk! but i corrected them that u're not tat kind of person n u're nice!!! wtf!! n now wat i get?!?? million of daggers stab into my heart ok?!??!?

fuck it!

i thought i was happy since dis morning.... listening to owl city's songs... calm melodies...

but during dis time, i keep texting the sms, n delete it without sending out.... doing the same shit for few times.... but i am so much curious than every1 else... im not sure later im gonna send out the text or not....

i dont even know why is he doing all this to me... i did no fault, i am not angry, and i try to forget it! but the more he treat me like this, the more i feel curious n started with a liltle anger... who am i he think?? i just wanna be as casual as i can... but the way he doing all this are so bull shit!! im not those crazy woman as wat he think ok?? and please... im not blind...

anyway, i am the 1 try to b casual, no point for avoiding me or ignoring me.... i dont eat ppl...(but i like to imagine eating human meat... lolz)...

*fuck all the negative thinking!!

*fuck all the bull shit excuses!!

*fuck cuz i know he might not bother anymore....

*fuck cuz i am suppose to b angry, but im not!!!!!!!!!!

M.A.C training and tired days

some old pics of me n melvin during a year+ relationship

yesterday start wif the mac spring collection training, a fun day n knew some new friends, lizzie from sabah and wayne from penang... nice people....

after the training, BB the trainer want us to wear dolly like dress during the event, n the problems come... cuz i dont even hav a single dress of the dolly like dress... gonna invest some money on those during dis fucking poor period... =.="

after the training, went to burger's studio n saw melvin was there practicing his dj skill, i feel like im back to yesterday which im still coupling with him... he still the same, quiet, fair, good loong and skinny... i was sitting there, enjoying the music n smoking... then, melvin asked me for lunch... we juz sitting at the mamak, didnt talk much as usual...

after lunch, a old schoolmate ask me for drink/dinner when im about to buy the tix of monorail to head back home, luckily he called me earlier... he pick me up at sg wang, n we went to a place that gave me lotz of memories... remind me those happi time... we talk alot during the conversation, he stil as funny as previous time... i knew he was trying to make me feel better since he knew tat i was feeling down... thankz alot man! u always the good guy that not available... lolz!!!(he not my ideal bf, but stil my ideal best fren forever!! thankx jun jie!)

day 2,

today, the 2nd day of training, the gal who sitting nex to me hav to do a make over for me... n the nightmares come!! she is not graduated wif professional makeup skill... the way she applying makeup on me was rude, harsh and i dont even understand wat shez explaining of the product during the process! she poked my eyes, pushing my head, turning my head... im not a doll of her la!! dont treat me like a corpse!! in the end... when i look at myself in da mirror... i lookz much or horrible than without makeup!!!! wat the hell!!! after i done the make over for her, i quickly removed the makeup on my face... really cant stand it! and of course she is so satisfy with the makeup i did for her, even my manager also said it was great!! (happi!!!)

now, im juz sitting at home n watching movies... downloading some nds games, it is been such a long time i didnt update my nds games...

btw... any1 wanna ask me out for drink? or hang out?! hahahaha.....

hot hot days!

things been doing this few days:

1. met ard... n stairs talk for quite long...

2. watched <> wif ard at sunway... great movie and percy juz the type of guy i like, lookz weak, skinny and cute... but he is too young!

3. eating satay at anna's house

4. drink, drank, drunk!

5. yumcha wif ling at mofa at starbucks.... chui sui while mofa is buring tissue (the middle east uncle was shocked!!)

6. gumbling at kent's and anson's house... win around 20 bucks! yahoo... at last i win sum money during cny! lolz... n fall asleep at kent's house... nice sofa but lotz of mosquito ler!

7. eating bah kut teh wif mic at jln ipoh... nice 1!

8. cant remember wat happened... lolz!

9. im thinking... im thinking....

10. eating the same green tea ice cream at sunway... my fave!

11. sniffing the cigg b4 light it

12. went to visit hong and lai at hospital... hope hong gonna b fine, n lai gonna recover soon!

things going to do....:

1. attend m.a.c training

2. last last last last... final final things to do is...

3. diet!!

4. tasting own blood... (almost everyday im tasting)

5. can i keep the smell of people? as my collection?! lolz

6. praying hard for hong....

7. trying to understand y guyz r complicated now adays

8. look for a lesbian love

9. keep talking nonsense

10. delete delete delete and delete (if im able to delete)

Chinese New Year.....

during this big day of chinese, i was empty... keep smoking, thinking, n dreaming all the time... not very enjoy the moment with family and relatives.... they never understand what im thinking n what i want..... *sometimes i myself also dont know what im thinking*

can't feel any cny season at all.... a very hard month for me.... but the beginning of the month was happy hanging out with friends, enjoy every moment that we shared... but cny just a very worst period of the month... as the old folks always say: life must go with bitter follow by sweetness (先苦后甜)... i think i got messed with it... lol!! was sweet at first, now suffering with bitter feeling...

looking the messy things at my home, i wish to clean up a lil..... but im just too lazy... lol... i wish my previous pets can accompany when im alone n quiet at home... i miss my catz... pets will never leave me unless they get sick n die, or im the 1 who leave them....

Stare.....

i like to stare at you when we're not talking,

i too curious on you...

it is sweet when u r pretending to punch my face if im staring at u n making a silly smile to u....

birthday month

1. 2nd Jan 2010, heartbroken
2. meet back a long lost fren
3. hang out alot with mofa chin,ling, huat, kenji, william n wisley
4. location: wisley's house, sg wang, ts, damansara, hartamas, mr.cow, uma rani etc...
5. been really heartbroke for the sms from a person
6. bought few tshirts... not so satisfy
7. cut and dye my hair by myself... cause too poor...
8. celeb bday with huat at damansara... enjoy the moment very much even just 2 of us
9. argue with kenji
10. yumcha til morning 6am
11. sleeping time: 1 hour for at least 3 days
12. drop mobile phone on the floor for almost everyday
13. done a pair of ribbon tattoo on my both wrist
14. lappy's batt broken bcause of the fight between my mum n bro
15. watch the whole series of SAW and Hannibal lecter
16. 2nd Feb... new start
17. waiting for salary.... cny around the corner n now havent buy a single shirt
18. muaks!!!!!!!!!!!